Jamie and I sadly left Capri and flew from Napoli to Paris. This was a very nerve-racking flight for us as we heard so many rumors about the baggage weight restrictions these smaller airlines enforced. (We were flying Meridiana.) So the night before we were throwing out every fool thing we could. I was dumping excess Listerine - she was giving up on random papers and toiletries. Jamie was intent on wearing every piece of jewelry and every heavy jacket and sweater she owned. I wish I had taken a picture in the taxi in Napoli… it was hilarious. She looked like one of those crazy bling-blanged women you see at casinos in Vegas.

And, of course, when we finally got to the airport, the girl who checked us in didn’t even bother to weigh our bags! All of that stress for nothing! This then liberated me to buy the one thing I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to get before leaving Italy - Montenegro! Fortunately the duty free shop had some so I’m all good!

When we got in to Paris we were starving. We ordered up room service and two bottles of wine. Dave arrived (he came down from London) and helped us finish it off. Then those two slackers passed out! We’d all just arrived in Paris and they were already looking defeated. So sad!

I forced the crew to rally around 9 to go to dinner at Closerie des Lilas. This is the restaurant where Hemingway wrote “For Whom the Bells Tolls” and is my favorite restaurant in Paris. Just imagining him and George Orwell and F. Scott Fitzgerald, among so many others, sitting there chatting, thinking and writing is pretty awesome to me. Of course, with such fame comes high prices. We had a bottle of Chambertin - which we now know was Napolean’s favorite wine - some plates of cheese, crepes, soups, and salads. (And, yes, we had the obligatory vegetable plate which is all that the French seem to think vegetarians want to eat for dinner!) After stealing three ash trays, one for each of us, we were off and all ready to totally pass out for the night!

The next day we got up and headed out to Versailles. We’d have a lot more pictures for you except the damn buildling was largely under renovation so it really didn’t look as spectacular as it normally would. This is Jamie’s luck - every place she goes is covered in scaffolding!

Inside we did get to see the infamous Hall of Mirrors which is pretty amazing. Took some pictures, fought off the mobs of tourists and listened to the long-winded guided tour. Those recordings make a point of identifying every painting and piece of furniture in a room. When you’re talking almost 30 rooms, you’re going cross-eyed from all the references… And, thus, you tend to start skipping the audio guide and just taking pictures instead.

The weather in Paris has been complete crap for our entire trip. When we first arrived it was chilly and rainy and prompted a shopping spree for warmer attire. This return leg of our trip was no different. Rainy and cold - every day! That also make Versailles a little less spectacular - and inviting. I know from past experience that wandering the gardens of Versailles can be as interesting as taking the building tour, but with the cold and wind and drizzle, we cut that part short. Above are a few pictures we managed to squeeze in.

After Versailles we headed back to Paris to have snacks and wine with my friend Maina. She and I met at Coachella this past spring and so I had to make a point of seeing my only truly French friend in Paris while here. She was a wonderful hostess! She made us the most delicious sweet tart, bought a bunch of typical Parisian desserts and cheeses and we drank a bottle of sweet sparkling traditional wine and then a bottle of Bordeaux. All very fun!

After recovering from the Maina feast, we tool a long stroll from our hotel in St. Germain des Pres up to the Seine and then all the way down to the Eiffel Tower. We figured this would work up our appetites for dinner. The rain stopped for our walk and we got a beautiful sunset view of the city and the Seine.

After taking our obligatory Eiffel Tower pictures we strolled around the right bank looking for a creperie for dinner. We managed to find one and we stuffed ourselves on crepes dinners and desserts and wine. A very happy (and fattening) end to our long day!

For our last full official day in Paris, we went to the Musee d’Orsay - Jamie’s favorite museum. Because the tourists are everywhere, we sent Dave on ahead to get us tickets so we could skip the horrible lines. That worked brilliantly. We saw the Renoir, Cezanne and Picasso special exhibit and then strolled through the rest of the impressionist rooms. At the end we settled in to my favorite part - the fancy museum restaurant - for some wine and cheese.

This is Jamie and Dave at the restaurant. Jamie celebrates more great French white wine while Dave contemplates all the great artists he’s just seen.

After a quick bite we wandered over to Notre Dame - the last stop on Dave’s trip with us. Raining again, we stopped for a quick picture, went inside to take it all in and then grabbed more crepes and headed back to the hotel in the rain. There we saw Dave off and back to London.

One of my favorite parts of Paris is Sacre Coure. This church is absolutely breath-taking. I remember a few years ago when I went in spring and the steps up the hill to the church were lined with all different colored tulips. I went inside and French nuns were singing hymns and they sounded like angels!

This trip to Sacre Coure was not quite as nice. We took the metro and battled our way up approximately 10 flights of steps to get out of the metro. (En route I tripped and bashed my knee - the first and only official fall for me on this trip! Of course it was kind enough to wait until the last day!)

We got to the top and went inside. Very beautiful - but very hot. Outside is cold and raining and inside you are wet and humid and surrounded by a zillion tourists. Sacre Coure was a short visit for us - and then we were on our way to walk down through Montmatre to Boulevard Haussman for a bit more shopping.

After shopping we headed over to the Arc d’Triomphe for dinner at a cafe on the Champs Elysees. We found a great spot that had vegetarian French onion soup - a favorite for me! Had sandwiches and St Emillion Grand Cru to celebrate our last meal on vacation! Too much wine made us giddy and we had a fun and goofy stroll on the Champs Elysees!

So that’s the end of our combined tour! Jamie was trying to show leg and hail us a taxi in that picture but it actually looks more like she’s waving goodbye to Paris!

Now it is Friday morning - day sixteen for me - and I have a few hours to go tour the Louvre before heading to the airport. Jamie has a quicker flight home while I have a long layover in New York City tonight. Going to Mexican Radio in Soho and going to catch some sleep at a hotel downtown before I fly back to Los Angeles - and back to the real world!

In a hurry since Capri’s Internet is even worse a situation than Rome’s, but here’s the stories from the past two days.

On Sunday Jamie and I wokeup early to take our train to Napoli. We were very nervous about the transfers we’d have to make to get to Capri.. Walk to the train, get on the train, get off the train, find a taxi, go to the ferry station, acquire ferry tickets, get on the boat, off the boat, then find another taxi to get us to the hotel. All of that worrying was for nothing. Of course the Italians took care of us! The train was super-simple, probably thanks to my experience understanding how trains in Italy work. The only annoying part was the loud obnoxious Americans sitting all around us. Yet again we understand why so many people hate Americans. They’re loud, they don’t try to understand or respect the people or culture or language.. Ugh. Very bad!

When we arrived in Napoli we went to the taxi queue and waited.. At the front of the line there was a guy shuffling everyone into cars.. When we stepped up, he says to us, “You two come with me!” He was waiting through the line to take the two blonde girls on a ride. Typical - and much appreciated.

He was super nice - a crazy driver, of course, as all men from Napoli are from my experience - and got us to Molo Beverello for the ferry very quickly. We arrived just two minutes before the quick ferry was to leave so he acquired a porter to take our bags and he and I ran to get tickets last minute. We made it on very quickly and relaxed, or rather basked, in the sun on top for the 40 minute ride from Napoli to Capri. We got off and unexpectedly found a driver waiting for us. We didn’t have to get a taxi - they took our bags and we were on our way to the top - Anacapri!

We arrived and the hotel, Caesar Augustus, and were given a quick tour of the facilities, the amazing panoramic views over the Bay of Naples and then shown to our suite. We have a huge terrace overlooking everything - it’s spectacular.

First stop was the infinity pool that we’ve seen so often in pictures. We grabbed our books and bikinis, parked ourselves under umbrellas and totally soaked up the good life.

After, we got cleaned up, order a bottle of wine and some cheese and sat outside enjoying the view. Then we were off to get a drink by the piano bar and on the terrace before our dinner reservation.

Of course, as fate would have it, we met some party playboys (so we’re guessing) who bought us drinks and invited us to dinner with them. (They are from California - well two were, one was from Melbourne, Australia.) We cancelled our reservation and went with them to La Capininna. First we have aperitivos, then one of the best Italian meals I’ve ever had. The best mozzarella yet on this trip - Perfectly crisp fiori di zucca - Jamie had her favorite bruschetta. The main course for me was eggplant parmesan - something I always hated until my last trip to Rome when I was sort of forced to try it. The Italians really do that well - and I don’t even like eggplant!

After dinner we drank more and returned to the hotel to look at the amazing moon lighting up the entire bay. This is absolutely, definitely one of the most beautiful places in the world!

Oh yes, and I almost forgot! Last night we saw Robin Leach staying at our hotel! You know you’re doing something right when you are staying at the same place as “Mr. Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous” himself!

After a late night, we woke up for breakfast before our private boat tour of Capri. We took our shuttle down to Marina Grande and met our captain, Giovanni. Got on his boat and he took us all around the island on a three hour tour. (No, we didn’t see Gilligan!) So many magnificent grottos with the greatest purple and orange coral! When we got to the Grotto Verde (Green Grotto) Giovanni let us jump off and swim through it. That was the best part! Jumping off and swimming through a grotto at capri! We couldn’t wipe the smiles off our faces. So fantastic!

Our tour continued.. Seeing many other grottos and historical monuments and amazing sides of the island. Finally we go to the Grotto Azurra (the infamous Blue Grotto) and we got to go inside. Last time I was here, I waited for almost an hour and the water was too rocky for us to go in. This time - just perfect! Imagining the Romans two-thousand years ago swimming in that grotto was amazing. We saw one set of tourists jump in and we were very jealous.. It is not allowed, but we really wanted to do it!

After our tour we returned for lunch.. which is very hard to accomplish at 3pm in the Italian world. Finally we found paninos in the village of Anacapri, just 50 metres from our hotel, and returned to also order wine and have more mozzarella di bufala.

Now we’re off to our postponed hotel dinner. We have to get up early tomorrow for our flight back to Paris. It is so sad to leave Italy! I could stay here forever!

As usual, I stayed in the room while Ray and Jamie and Anthony went out touring. They saw the Colloseo and met me for lunch. Boy was it hot! Just sitting out at lunch, under the shade, was making us all sweat.

  
After lunch we all strolled up to the Fontana di Trevi. I told Jamie that the Trevi Fountain is the most beautiful thing in Rome - and as soon as she saw it, she agreed completely! We pushed our way through the crowded chaos, settled by the water, took pictures and threw our pennies into the fountain. As is customary, you throw the pennies into the fountain over your shoulder wishing for a return to Rome.. Of course you know my wishes was extra concentrated.. I was tempted to through a few hundred Euro in, if only that would work!

After lunch, Jamie and Ray and Anthony went to see the Pantheon and the Spanish Steps while I returned to the hotel to meet up with Melanie for some more relaxing-by-the-pool time. Eventually Anthony and Jamie joined us and we spent most of the evening basking in the sun, drinking Pinot Grigio and snacking. Totally the life!

Finally we went out for our last dinner in Roma. Wandered over by the Colloseo and met up with Dario. Everyone was starving, as is our trend, and so we quickly found a spot. Had a wealth of food, chatted a lot more (I think I spent the whole time talking to Dario - surprise!) and then headed back home. A long late night walk - everyone exhausted!

Now it is Sunday morning and Jamie and I are off to Capri! It’s a long journey so wish us luck!

I’m in a hurry toay so can’t really write a long blog update on yesterday. In the morning Ray and Jamie and Anthony went to the Vatican to see The Sistine Chapel and San Pietro. I met them over there for lunch - and to see San Pietro. The lines were crazy long so I didn’t bother to go inside but still fun to be back over there for a bit.

Ray, Jamie and Anthony in front of San Pietro

After their visit, we had Rome’s worst pizza. Everyone was starving so we went to anyplace we found and we paid the price. But it did fill us up and that is what mattered most just then.

Following bad lunch, we went to Campo dei Fiori for some gelato. A much better deal - 2 euros for a huge cone! Then we wandered over to Piazza Navona where Jamie and I spent some time looking for oil paintings for our homes in Hollywood. We did some bargaining and each picked up two pieces. They’ll look great back in LA - and remind us of Italy constantly! Plus it’s funny that we both liked the same artist so our mirrored apartments will now also have the same artist’s work in them!

Of course we had to return and use the pool. Having a hotel pool in Rome is the best thing ever. After walking around all day, we hop into our suits and hit the roof. Take a quick dip (the water is a little too cold for a long swim) and then we order snacks and a drink and lie out on this big cabanas for light naps. You can probably tell I’ve been doing this as I am getting really tan and my hair is turning crazy blonde.

 
For dinner we met up with a friend of Anthony’s, Adrienn, who is from Budapest. She also brought along Daniel, who also lives in Budapest but is from Portugal. Yet again, an international dinner for us all! Very fun!

We had dinner at the hostaria on my old street. A very good deal - 6 people, 120 Euros - including lots of food and wine! Love Rome for big dinners at cheap costs! I had my old favorite - the mushroom, truffle and cream bombolotti. Jamie and Ray ordered Bruschette Pomodoro, Tomato Salads and Spaghetti Pomodoro. That’s a lot of tomatoes!

After dinner, we found a spot in Campo dei Fiori to watch the locals mix and mingle. I told them that Campo is a great find in Rome. It’s a little hidden and so only the clued-in tourists find it. Just tons of young people drinking and mingling and walking around the square. When Melanie showed up, we sat in the corner remembering all our old times in Campo. I met her and my friend Dave - and Dario, Antonio and Paul - all of my Roman friends pretty much - in Campo. So many memories - and such crazy energy there. It’s a great place and now Ray and Jamie want to return again tonight.

I’m off for lunch and then a look at Fontana di Trevi - perhaps my favorite thing in Rome. Will take pictures for sure - how can I not?

Oh and I forgot to mention. All week we have noticed a regular guard standing outside the suite to one of the rooms on our floor. Finally Anthony chatted the guard on duty up about who was inside. Come to find out, the Prince and Princess of Saudia Arabia are staying on our floor. We are pretty sure all the room adjoining ours are taken by their entourage. So don’t we seem silly, a pair of blonde girls from Hollywood and our wacky swimsuit wearing friends, strolling up and down the same halls!

Ever since New Year’s Eve I’ve been saying that I wanted to spend my birthday this year in Rome - and today it happened! I love this city so much! As I have always said, if I could live here forever, I would. Just love it - everything about it!

Today was not about touring at all. Today was about seeing all my friends and having a fun day. In the end, it worked out. Everyone I really wanted to see on my birthday - at least of the people who are in Rome - came out!

 
Anthony arrived at around noon.. Ray came over by 10:30am. I had room service - of course - just like everyone else. Melanie came by at 1 and we were out to lunch at a restaurant off of Via Veneto that a friend/student of hers owns. We drank three bottles of wine between us, ate a lot of yummy cheese and appetizers and pasta - and then walked back drunk to the hotel. Apparently Ray and Anthony had a little comical run-in with the Polizia too while the girls were in the store buying Mel some smokes.. Something that would naturally come from the imaginations of two Italian policemen when they see three blonde girls gaggling down the road mid-afternoon.

From there we all went to the pool on the roof of my hotel. Yes, the pool! In Rome! This is almost unheard of - which is why it was essential to the day. Everyone but Ray jumped in - a bit chilly - We have a great picture of us all lined up like sea lions against the edge too. Will post when Anthony sends it along.

Lying in the sun was amazing and relaxing - and sobering. By six I had to shower to meet Antonio for drinks at seven while everyone else took a much needed nap.

After a few drinks with my favorite Italian (sorry Dario, you’re a close second though!) we all went over to Trastevere to find the restaurant there that serves the black truffle pizza that I’ve been dreaming of for years - ever since leaving Rome two and a half years ago! For a minute I was afraid it was shut, but we found it. And just in time! Everyone was very moody and very much in need of food.

At the end of dinner they had a sort of Italian birthday cake and song-singing for me… Half in English, half in Italian. Combined with the candle numbered “3″ on top, it was a very silly but fun moment. I blew out the candle and wished for more Rome in my life - of course. How happy I was to be in Rome with my favorite people!

After dinner we met up with Dario and went to Arthur’s, the pub down the road in Trastevere that we used to spend many a night at when I lived here. Had a few more drinks, met some of Melanie’s Italian guy friends (including one of her exes who I’d only spoken by phone with until then). More drinks ensued until it was officlally closing time - 2 am. Jamie and Ray and Anthony and I walked back to the hotel - a bit of a hike - but it was such a nice night in Rome that I didn’t even notice. The air was perfect, the friends were perfect, the pizza was very good. Everything I had hoped for on my 32nd birthday!

We started the day completely hung over, as the last blog detailed. Then we checked out luggage and soaked up the sun by the lagoon pool at the hotel. This pool is apparently very primo as it costs 80 euros a day to get in if you are not staying at the hotel (since the hotel is only $400 a night, perhaps just buying a room makes more sense?) So we chilled by the pool, I did couple laps (read: 1 lap) and we ordered overly expensive fruit salads and water for breakfast.

After sunning ourselves by the pool, as per any quality Monaco vacationer, we took a taxi to the Grimaldi Palace and took a tour of all of their fanciness and history. After we shopped for souveniers for our favorite people back home and then took a long stroll along the harbour back to the casino square.

A prerequesite of any visit to the Monaco casino square is a drink at the Cafe des Paris. I had a “Monte Carlo Summer” which is strawberry puree and champagne. Jamie had yet another glass of white wine - her new favorite. We enjoyed watching the fancy cars and the sunset and then took a long stroll back to our hotel.
 
Before leaving we had to have our third order of their magnificent tomato & mozzarella di bufala salad and yet another bottle of their amazing 2001 Mersault. 150 euros, but when in Monaco, you must do what people in Monaco do!

Then we caught a quick taxi to the Monaco train station to catch out train. Yet again, the trains were scary. Firstly we realized that I can’t read a European train ticket to save my life.. I thought our train left at 9:43 but it was actually scheduled for 9:22. Fortunately we were there early and this is an Italian train so it didn’t arrive until 9:45 anyway.

Another fear for us was that our tickets were screwed up as our marked cabin was labeled “2nd class” instead of “sleeper” on the composition des trens. This freaked us out. Jamie wanted another bottle of Mersault she was so worried! But when we got on the train it was all perfect. We had our own train car room - three beds for two girls - one bed for our luggage. Worked out perfectly!

At the first stop in Italy we were hanging out the window like any girl in a 1940s movie might do when we met a nice cart purveyor wandring the Ventimiglia station. We screamed “Buona Notte” and “Ciao” - practicing our Italian - and he fancied us so offered us some wine. Well, of course, we agreed! He insisted we bought 4 bottles of white for 12 euros! Wow! What a price difference compared to Monaco!

So on our first minutes in Italy everything was already going perfectly. We had our own train car, four bottles of Italian wine and beds to sleep in!

The next day we wokeup to the last hour of our train ride, rolling through Chianti country and into Roma. Now we’re arrived, spent two hours walking through the Foro Romano and by the Colesseo before checking into our hotel and taking a shower. Then the most amazing (only because it was the first!) Italian meal we’ve had yet - with Ray - who flew in from New York just this morning. Bruschette, Caprese, Pizza and Pasta - along with 1 e mezzo litres of vino bianco! So wonderful that it inspired us to buy more wine for our hotel room! (We are staying at the Exedra Boscolo at Piazza della Republicca. If you are a movie fan you will recognize this as the hotel that Julia Roberts stayed at in Ocean’s Twelve.) Now.. as I type.. Jamie and Ray have passed out from the Roman fun. Slackers!

 
Next? More drinking and a stroll over to Campo dei Fiori to meet up with any Italian friends who can make it out. As always, my Italian friends are very Italian and hard to plan with - but we’ll certainly see them eventually. And between now and then, there’s so much else to see and do in Rome, we’re entertained!

After shopping we came back for quick lunch and then massages and manicures at the Cinq Mondes spa at our hotel. The massages were very nice but the beauty salon was a total disaster. We both wanted manicures and pedicures but nobody there spoke English well and they confused the whole thing. It was a stressful disaster and required a bottle of Mersault and a cheese plate via room service to help us forget about it. Our leftover cheese was quite popular with a bird friend we dubbed “Monsieur Bird” and who didn’t seem to mind our speaking to him in bad French.

And, yes, Alright. Here’s the Monte Carlo Casino Night story.

Getting to dinner was a huge pain.. they don’t have enough taxis here and our hotel is not really walking distance from the casino square.. and they won’t pre-call for you for a taxi.. so we had to stand around in our dresses and shoes outside for over 1/2 hour waiting for our taxi.. and being really late to our dinner reservation. Finally we did get there.. we went to an Italian place since we’re pretty damn sick of the limited vegetarian choices on the French menus.. (Jamie is a bit of a 2 year old.. she eats meat but won’t try anything new.. so she’s decided just to claim she’s vegetarian also and have the exact same things that I order…) The Italian place was classic napolitan style… i.e. you tell him what you do or don’t like and he just brings you heaps of servings from whatever they’ve got going.. That translated to entirely too much food… I feel totally disgusting right now.. I don’t think I need to eat again until I get to Rome tomorrow… But we drank good wine and started to chat with the neighbor table.. a couple from Long Island.. they were fun and we discussed shopping and their spoiled kids and all the places I’ve lived and traveled.. I taught them a very valuable lesson too.. Not to tip on top of the bill in Europe. They had a 500 euro dinner at the Alain Ducasse restaurant the day before AND tipped after… Silly Americans… I explained to just leave a little something.. not the standard 20%.. they had no idea.. Heh.

 

After dinner we strolled to the casino.. took some pictures.. we were pretty drunk from 1 1/2 bottles of wine between the two of us.. Went in to the casino.. loved that we get in for free because we are staying at one of the select hotels that guarantees you admittance and for free.. They only have 2 blackjack tables open.. one with 25 euro minimum and one with 50 euro min.. since I only wanted to play with 400 euro (a lot compared to what I would do in las vegas, but this is monte carlo and it has to be done…) so we had to wait for the 25 euro table… fortunately they had a craps table.. which i thought was pretty unheard of in europe.. but that made me happy and I convinced jamie to come play with me… sort of fun.. i learned the french and italian versions of “same dice” (which is what we request when we shoot the dice and one goes over the edge and off the table).. “estaci dadi” in italian.. and “meme dice” (where the “dice” sounds like “dee”) in french. i think they found us pretty funny.. but it eventually got late and nobody else would play (because europeans don’t know how to play craps).. jamie lost the 100 euros she was willing to play.. but i carried on.. and eventually made back what i lost at the beginning and was close to even when they shut the table down on me… then we went to black jack and finally i got a seat at “first base” - the first seat beside the dealer - which is a pretty crap seat… but whatever. made friends with the other players.. tried to speak to everyone but the guy next to me was german and i don’t know a lick of german… jamie eventually got a seat too… she landed a black jack right away which made me jealous.. but then somehow as the hands continued she lost her remaining 100 euro and didn’t want to put down more.. i am not as smart.. so i eventually lost my starting 200 and put in another 200…. was losing pretty seriously.. toward the end i had to get out an extra 10 to double down on a hand.. which then paid off and i was on my way back up.. they told us they were soon closing the table so i started to bet like an ass.. doubling and splitting anything i could (i know you don’t understand all of this.. sorry) and eventually i got myself back up to 360 euros from my original 400 (well, 410). the last hand was brilliant.. i bet 50, got 2 fours against the dealer’s 8.. and i split the fours.. (meaning two hands now at 50 euro each).. one hand went over and the other hit 21 exactly.. so i won.. sort of… and that’s how they ended me… down 50 euros overall.. but at least i got a handful of free drinks and some really crazy fun hands at the monte carlo blackjack tables…

We met some brits while playing too.. older guys here on conference… one of them shared a taxi back to the hotel with us (or rather, he paid)… then tried to convince the front desk to give us a late checkout… which is apparently impossible here… whatever. i think we promised to meet them for lunch but having just wokeup, jamie and i both agree that we feel like crap from all the drinking (she did patron shots after the wine too.. ugh).. so i think we’ll just bake by the pool and then go to the grimaldi castle this afternoon and evening before we catch our night train to rome.

(Right: The amazing view from our room last night with the moon.. This picture totally doesn’t capture how brilliant it was…)

We are in Monaco now.. but had the worst time getting here. We went to the train station on Saturday to pre-purchase tickets so that we’d be sure to get seats and not have any trouble there. Since American credit cards don’t use the bank chip yet we are completely unable to use our credit cards on the automated machines.. so we had to speak to an attendant. My French is not what it used to be but it is good enough to do these sorts of things.. Unfortunately the ticket woman did not listen to us - me - and booked us for tickets on Monday the 2nd instead of Sunday the 1st. (We wondered why the 9:45 train was available on the machine but was not available for us via her, but we didn’t argue.) We didn’t figure this out though until too late. Got up at 5:45am to catch the 7:15 train.. Got on and were fine.. that train is a local so no problems. Then we get to Lyon where we have to change trains.. and we only have 10 minutes.. a problem multiplied by the fact that we have to carry our 50 lb luggage down and then up stairs to switch tracks. We make it and get on.. but there’s no room for our luggage. So we rearrange everyone’s things and then go to our seats.. which are taken! We try to argue with the older French couple but get nowhere. Then Jamie goes to ask the conductor just as the train is closing its doors and we find that the tickets are for the wrong date.. and the train is sold out. As he tells us this in French he closes and locks the train doors.. So we are confused.. He knows we have bad tickets but isn’t making us get off.. “Um, okay” we think. He says to just go find seats anywhere. (Again, imagine all of this communicated only in French.. much more confusing.. ) So we find seats and are fine for 30 minutes, until the next stop. There the train fills up and we get evicted from the seats we’ve taken.. So we go looking for more.. but none to be found. I give up and say we should just sit in the dining car..Jamie carries on and eventually finds us a hall seat.. hot and smelly by the bathroom.. interrupted by constant people traffic.. but a seat we can share nevertheless.

All of this seems fine until we get to Marseilles. I assumed that at that stop people would get off and we could probably find seats for the last 2 hours of the 4 1/2 hour trip.. Sure enough, a lot of people get off. Not just a lot though.. ALL THE PEOPLE get off. This tells us that something is up and we need to switch trains.. So we finally disembark with our stuff.. we see a bunch of people getting on to a train labeled “Nice” (our destination) so we follow suit.. Again, the train is painfully oversold and crowded… There’s no seats and no place for luggage. This is when I give up and say we just go buy new tickets for the next train to Nice instead of fighting on this one. Jamie agrees. So, again, we can’t buy tickets on the machine so we have to wait in the horrible ticket agent line.. We finally get to the front, get an English speaking attendant so that we can explain the ticket problems we’re having and he gets us free new tickets for the next train.. We grab sandwiches and just make the 11:47 train to Nice.. This train is set out differently so we end up with our own private 6 person cabin - a huge improvement! Jamie stands almost the whole ride, taking pictures of the Mediterranean and southern French villages and countryside.
 
Finally we get to Nice. At this point we are so beaten down and exhausted - it is 2:30pm and we left at about 7am.. That means over 7 hours of travel for what should have been 5 hours. I vote we take a taxi the rest of the way to Monaco.. We know from the front-desk in Beaune that the ride is “expensive” at about 50 euros.. but we don’t care… Until we step out and find only two taxis waiting and the driver says it is 90 euros to Monaco.. We balk.. he claims it costs extra because of our luggage… We leave, knowing that it’s only 10 euros or less to take the local train from Nice to Monaco.. So we go to do that.. Yet again unable to buy tickets on the machine because of the credit card situation, we wait in the horribly long line.. Then I find a regional ticket machine that takes coins and we have enough coins to cover this.. so that’s how we finally got to Monaco! Running and lugging our bags up stairs to take the regional train that smelled of pee and was full of beach-wear clad French people.

Of course the trip is not so simple as to end kindly there.. We get off in Monaco alongside a 30+ person tour group from Scotland. They all seem to have been drinking so they’re very chatting with us two blonde American girls.. but we are just dead exhausted and not really up for their chipper moods. We get to the taxi stand and, as I remembered from last time, there’s no taxi there. We call via their taxi machine but it just keeps giving us a busy signal. We also are not so smart as to have written down the phone number for our hotel so we have no way to ring them and ask them to call us a taxi either. I return to the station and have the information desk woman (in Monaco there’s a million tourist information desks) order us a cab. That takes 10 minutes of waiting but finally happens - and FINALLY we arrive!

 
One thing can definitely be said for Monaco: no matter how shitty your day went, Monaco can almost immediately wipe away all that stress. We got a free upgrade to a sea view room at our hotel, the Monte Carlo Bay, which is the newest and one of the poshest resorts in Monaco. We freshened up and then went down for champagne cocktails (of course!) which turned into an early dinner with our new favorite white wine - Mersault. We had a 2001 and Jamie loved it - I think the first time she’s ever voluntarily drank, much less enjoyed, a white wine. We had tomato, pesto and mozzarella di bufala salads and it took Jamie about an hour to eat hers since she was relishing every bit of the amazing arugula, tomatoes and, of course, cheese. And we aren’t even in Italy yet! Drunk and getting lots of attention from the rich foreign boys, we decide to go take a nap and maybe later pop in to the bar downstairs.. Which never happens. It’s now after midnight and we’re both awake again for a bit.. sitting on our balcony overlooking the Mediterranean.. wishing it wasn’t calling for rain tomorrow.. but thrilled that we already have massages, manicures and pedicures on the menu to keep us busy. I’m sure we’ll also find a way to go shopping too! And then.. tomorrow night.. we play at Monte Carlo!

 
Yes, this is Monaco. Definitely one of the most amazing places in the world. I keep telling Jamie that it will be hard to decide which is more beautiful and amazing - Monaco or Capri. We’ll see!

Our first stop was at Vin Sensation in Beaune, just down the road from our hotel, Hotel le Cep. Here we learned about the different classifications of Burgundy wines and tasted 12 different wines: 6 white and 6 red.

After we went to dinner at Le Gourmandin where we had the best gourgeres and dessert imaginable, along with some very peculiar French vegetables. (My mother would be so proud!) Then we rode the carousel and rocked out to some local French pop-rock band in the city’s center square. Fortunately we fled just before the show ended as to avoid the odd French admirers we’d attracted while giggling aboard the plastic horses.

Today we went for a lunch tasting at Olivier Laflaive which is in Puligny-Montrachet. We had 14 of their wines along with more wonderful gourgeres and a ridiculously amazing plate of cheese (including the orgasm-inducing Epoisses). This took us over four hours but was much fun. I also taught Jamie her first full French sentence, which she practiced on the wine-stewards at Olivier Laflaive: “Je voudrais boire plus du vin, sil vous plait… maintenant!”

Our driver, Pierre, who has been our exclusive chauffeur since arriving in Dijon yesterday, drove us back and let us take pictures in front of the Chauteau Mersault. Not only is that chateau beautiful, it is also the home of my favorite white wine from this region.

Lastly we took a Safari Tour of the Cote des Nuits region. We stopped at a tasting cellar where we saw how they store their wine in very old oak barrels (so as to avoid the oak flavor that California wines cultivate so much) and how they stack them. It has made me rethink my own wine collection! After we drove through Nuits Saint Georges and over to Cambertin, the home of Napolean’s favorite wine. We stopped off in front of Romanee Conti, where they turn 4 acres of vines into 1,000 bottles of $5,000-$10,000 per bottle wine. Now that’s impressive! (More reasonable but yet also impressive was seeing the La Tache grapes. A bottle of La Tache ages 12 years before being released and then is priced at $1,000 a bottle. I think maybe we can do that… someday!)

   

So that’s it for our tour of Beaune and our Burgundy wine education experience. Tomorrow we take an early train to Monaco via Lyon and Nice. We look forward to 3 days of relaxing by the pool, gambling, massages and more wonderful food!

We meant to go to Sacre Coure but the big summer sales are on in Paris and as soon as Jamie and I found our way to Boulevard Hausmann, we got sucked in. This is the ceiling inside the famous Galleries Lafayette.

We shopped for hours and hours. You can tell how much fun Kyle had. He was our porter.. carrying our bags and offering us his take on fashion advice.

Tonight’s feature: The Moulin Rouge!

We were seated at a very front row table.. As Kyle explained, “Close enough to tell which ones are real and which ones aren’t.” We’re pretty sure they’re all real though….

The food at the Moulin Rouge was not so great, but the champagne made up for it.

They wouldn’t let us take pictures inside but they took this one of us and it actually didn’t suck!
Unfortunately sitting so close meant we got doused with our drinks when the can-can girls kicked over our lamp and water - more than one time!

After drying off from the show, we did the obligatory tourist thing and went for cocktails at the Buddha Bar.

Yes, just what we needed. More drinks!

That’s the end of Day Two!